Kitty: the better side of Death Eaters
by popecatapetal
Summary: Kitty Hawke is an orphan being looked after by a group of Death Eaters. This story is about her life from age 5 onwards, in diary form. Own Character: if you don't like this, don't read. Bad spelling in first chapter, as character is only five years old.
1. Chapter 1

This is a story about an original character – to those who are not fans of OCs, turn back now. I am not Ms Rowling, nor am I in any way connected with Bloomsbury or Warner Bros.

And now, read on.

Chapter 1

otober 28 1984

unkl lanly gev me this diry so i cud practis ritin. he is meking me lurn to rite properly but it isnt wurking verry wel yet. mis lidea, unkl lanlys gurlfrend is teechn me, and she ses if i lurn reel fast, sheel get me a pet. id like a pet. id like a big dog. id go on woks with it and id play with it and feed it reel gud. i wud col it monstur and it wud be my best frend.

nvembr 5

unkel lanly ses i shud rite down my histry. i donet rememer most of it. unkel lanlys told me sum thins tho. like when i was a litel babey my parens dide an the mastr tuk care of me fur a wile. then he gev me to the lesranjs but they got rested and ther in jale now. so the mastr sent me to unkl avry. i stil see him sumtims. hes reel nise. hes reely big and hes danejrus wen he gets cros but he luvs babeys an hes reel gentel wit them. but he got hurt in a fite so he cudnt mined me enymore. so i went to morcam. unkl lanly ses hes an ivil bastrd and he rememers heerin morcam seying that he yused to hit me an all, so the mastr tuk me away from him and torchurd him fur a wile then gave me to unkl lanly heer at the hotel an ive bin heer evr sins. the mastr got hurt reel bad a few yeers bak, and lodes of peepl think hes ded, but evrywun at the hotel knose hel cum bak. ther al wating.

Aprel 27 1985

I worked realy hard at my writing and now i dont make so manny mstakes. I havent even had time to rite in my diery becose ive been workin so hard, and then when i was ready i showed aunt Lidia my writing. She said wel done and then she went away. I waited for a long time becaus i thougt she had gon to get my dog, but she dint come back. When i saw her again later i asked her about my pet and she laufhed and said shed give it to me later. and she did. Sort of. Only it wasnt a dogg. it was a mous.But I did say id take it on walks an call it Monster and love it so i will. But i wish it was a dog.

June 4

Monster Mouse died yesterday. He got out of his cage and aunt Lidia stepped on him by axident. She was really sorry and she said shed get me a new one if i wanted, but i said no. I loved Monster Mouse, but I always wished he was a dog. Theres no point in having another pet that i dont really want. I asked Lidia if I could have a dog, but she laughed and said id never be able to look after it. I suppose shes right. See what hapened to my mouse, and it was a lot smaller. Id probaly let a dog get killed by a spell or something.

April 28 1986

I've been working really hard at my writing and my reading because aunt Lidia says she'll get someone to teach me some magic when I'm able to write really well. I think I'm pretty good now, so Lidia is going to ask uncle Langley tomorrow. Fingers crossed...

April 29

I get to learn magic! Uncle Langley said yes! Lidia's going to start me off on some basic curses tomorrow, and uncle Langley says he'll teach me some poisons! I'm so happy!

October 11

I started learning about plants a week ago. Mister Alexis arrived in the hotel and he's an expert on Herbology so Lidia asked him if he'd teach me a few things while he's here. So far, I've learned about the toxic qualities of common British plants and how to tend to some of the less harmful ones, but he says that he'll give me a mandrake before he leaves next week, and when he comes back, he'll show me what can be done with it. Uncle Langley is delighted mister Alexis is here, because he'd the main supplier of rare potions ingredients in Britain. Mister Alexis isn't so thrilled, because Uncle Langley is buying up his entire stock.

January 9 1987

Lidia gave me a wand for new year! It's one of her old ones and it has bit of unicorn hair poking out of it and it sometimes sets fire to things and blows things up but it's a wand! I can practice charms on my own now! Well, not exactly on my own - there has to be someone in the room, but I can do it even when Lidia's busy now. And uncle Langley gave me a little cauldron and a key to his storeroom so I can practice potions when he's not around too. I feel so loved!

May 16

Jamie Kinealty is staying in the hotel! The world-famous astrologist! Here! And he said he'd teach me how to read the stars! He's setting up his telescope right now, and he's going to teach me the constellations tonight! I love my life!

August 22

Mister Alexis arrived back today with a huge man-eating Spectagora in tow. It was quite funny - it didn't dare take a bite out of him, because he has it so well trained, but it snapped at anyone else who went past. The only way he could stop it was to threaten it with the lowest of the low - that he'd chop it up and make it into soup. It stopped then. Plants don't seem to mind being used in potions, but they can't even stand to hear the word 'soup'. It winced every time he said it. Then we made up a song all about soup, just to see it squirm. I have a very interesting sadistic streak. I must use it more often!

December 12

I made my first accurate prediction today! Well, last night, actually, just before midnight, but close enough... I predicted the arrival of a dark stranger who walks in shadows and carries a burden of shame, and lo-and-behold, a vampire walked in the door just after sunset today! Uncle Langley insists that he's not a vampire, that he's just an odd pale man, and Jamie says that the prophecy fits even if the man isn't a vampire, but I've always wanted to meet one, so I'm going to convince myself that he is, no matter what anyone else says.

February 16 1988

Uncle Langley is working 24 hours a day, eight days a week, to raise enough money to add an extension to the hotel. He's let about half the staff go to save money, he's persuaded some of the long-term guests help out with the laundry and he's bloody well making ME work in the kitchen! I can't cook! My whole life, I've taken pride in not being able to cook, and now, I have to cook. It's not bloody fair! He says that cooking is just like Potions. The only non-poisonous potion I can make is a laxative! Damn him!

June 3

I am so tired, it isn't even funny any more. I cannot believe he did that... To save money, uncle Langley declined the builder's offer of help and had us build the Grindewald-cursed extension. All my muscles ache. I've discovered new muscles, muscles that no-one ever knew about, because they're aching too. Even my earlobes hurt. I thought they were just flaps of skin! I'm going to sleep for a month, then I'm going to get up and poison that bloody slave-driver. G'night.

December 28

It's nearly New Year! Wahoo! I love December! First Solstice, then New Year! Uncle Langley says that, originally, Solstice would have signified the beginning of the New Year, but the Muggles changed it with their religions and all that. He says the really devout Pure-Bloods even have their own calendar that has December 21 as New Year's Day. I'd hate to do that. I love the way we have two parties really close together! We just put the decorations up at the start of December and leave them up til about midway through January. It's like the whole month is a holiday! Lidia says that the Muggles have another celebration on the 25th called Christmas. She explained it to me, but I don't really understand it - something about their god being born. I thought gods weren't born, that they just existed, but some Muggles believe that. Odd. I told Lidia I wouldn't mind it - three parties in December instead of two, but she said that the Muggles who celebrate Christmas don't usually celebrate Solstice as well. I don't get that either. Solstice is so... obvious - the shortest day of the year. You can see it - you have evidence of it. Oh well, I guess this just confirms what I've thought for a long time - Muggles are crazy!

March 14 1989

Apparently, today is my birthday. I'm ten years old today. I never wondered before. I mean, I knew my age, and I sort of knew when I'd been born - in Spring. But I never wondered about the date before. I wonder why? Uncle Langley gave me a library card and permission to go whenever I want (sub clause - 'within reason, of course') Jamie gave me his first telescope, and a blanket to sit on so I don't freeze my arse. Thoughtful man. And Mister Alexis sent me a card from Nepal with some Yeti hair and a promise of a garden of my own when he gets back. Happy Birthday to me!


	2. Chapter 2

This is a story about an original character – to those who are not fans of OCs, turn back now. I am not Ms Rowling, nor am I in any way connected with Bloomsbury or Warner Bros.

And now, read on.

Chapter 2

September 5

I have been so busy the past few months! Mister Alexis came back from Nepal with a surprise - a wife! More than that, a pregnant wife! The baby was born two months ago, and I've been on night-time nappy-and-bottle-duty ever since. As well as that, kind uncle Langley decided to give me my OWLs (unofficially, of course) so I don't think I've slept in weeks. And even though I've taken these exams, I still can't get a good job because, as I've said before, it's unofficial. On the plus side, I am now eligible for many of the fine lower-paid jobs this great country has to offer. Any of the really good jobs, such as... oh, anything higher than a street-sweeper, requires NEWTs, which I can't get because I would have to go to school, which I can't do because, officially, I don't exist! Yeah, that's what we found out the other day when uncle Langley tried to get my OWLs corrected by a professional. They can't do it because I'm not on the register, which legally means I was never born. And I can't produce witnesses to say that I was, in fact, born because:

- My parents are dead, so they can't testify,

- I don't remember the actual event, so I'm not a reliable witness,

- We don't know how to locate the doctor who delivered me,

- Even if we could locate said doctor, it is highly unlikely that he would be able to recognise me after all this time, and

- Most importantly, there is no evidence to suggest that I am, in fact, living, because the paperwork doesn't exist (Mere vital signs don't count for anything, it seems)

If the Devil exists, he's got to be a lawyer. No mere human being could have such a twisted mind that he could invent one. GAAAAAAAAH!!!

January 7 1990

I still don't legally exist, but mentally, I'm becoming more and more substantial by the second. I've read a book every day ever since I got a library card last April and I'm still doing all my lessons. And Lidia wonders why I'm always so hungry! Life is good.

March 19

Sean Casey, a Magical Creatures expert from Galway in Ireland, has become one of our permanent guests. He arrived the other day carrying a small suitcase containing his clothes, and three crates containing his books, charts and one small cat named Jester. He paid five years rent up front, moved into room 219, and within an hour, it looked like he had lived there for years. He is very interesting - he knows practically everything there is to know about magical animals, and I have persuaded him to teach me. He's not a very orthodox teacher - he goes off on tangents all the time. You'd think if he went on enough tangents, he should eventually come back to his starting point, but apparently the laws of maths don't apply to him. But I do learn things. All the tangents have a point, and even if he doesn't always reach it, I learn a lot along the way.

August 12

Another guest! Uncle Langley is so proud. This one is strange, though, even for me, and I'm used to weirdness. She's a hippy-type person, and I think she's eaten too many magic mushrooms or something because she is truly odd. She's not a witch, or a squib, or even a mixed-blood, as far as we can make out, but she doesn't seem freaked by magic at all. She sort of ignores it most of the time, and when it does register, she just seems impressed. She's really nice, though. She says her name is Gryphon, but no parent could be that cruel, could they? She's got grey hair down to her waist, so she was probably a real hippy in the sixties, not just someone who thinks the clothes are cool. Not that they are. She looks like she's wearing carpets, curtains and tablecloths, held together with silk scarves. And she could probably pay off world debt if she sold her jewellery. But she's friendly, and easy to talk to, so I like her. But if she tries to get me to dress like her one more time, I am going to rip open her stomach with one of her earrings and strangle her with her own intestines!

I wonder where that came from? Must be the Master's influences asserting themselves. Fun!

February 23 1991

Sorry it's been so long. I've been doing a lot of study, and helping out with Alexis Junior, and reading Muggle sci-fi books... Oh, who am I kidding?! Just the last one, really! Best books ever written! I mean, I'm all in favour of magical supremacy, but witches and wizards have no imagination! Yes, they are smarter, more powerful people, but where is the imagination gene?! And why do we have no machines? Magic isn't that bloody good! Muggles are odd, backward little people, but when it comes to books and machines, they reign supreme. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a Silverberg to finish.

July 28

Uncle Langley finally got someone to correct my OWLs and I got all Os! I'm so proud! I'm so tired!

December 21

Happy Solstice! I got some lovely candles today (that's what we give as Solstice presents - most useful thing on the shortest day of the year) - a beeswax one from Lidia that should last a good few burns, a set of nightlights and a painted glass holder from uncle Langley, a white howling wolf one from Sean Casey, a bottle of mage-light from Jamie, and a pot of luminous lichen from Mister Alexis and family. Also a violent violet one from Gryphon which I thanked her for very politely, then banished it out the window of my room as far as I could before the stench contaminated the entire house. Even though it's mid-winter, I'm sleeping with the windows open until the purple fog in my room disperses. It could take a while. I gave everyone plaited candles I made myself from the stubs of the old ones I've been collecting all year. They all seemed to like them. I hope uncle Langley got the message - I have no money.

April 1

Happy belated birthday to me. It's belated because I've been very busy recently, what with a sudden influx of visitors. Damn this good weather! Everyone's migratory instincts are kicking in early. We've had waves of bloody Scottish people crowding into all the hotels in the neighbourhood because we have fine weather for the first time in about twenty years. I'm so tired... I'm still not able to cook, and uncle Langley has been trying to teach me for years. I'm going to bed now, even though it's only half nine, because we're up at the crack of dawn again tomorrow morning - five o' clock. I didn't even know there was a five in the morning...

October 6

Thank you Merlin, Grindewald, or any deity out there that's listening! They're gone! They're all gone! The tourist season is over and the only people staying in our hotel are Lidia, mister Alexis and family, Gryphon, Sean and Jamie. And me and uncle Langley, obviously. No more staying up til two in the morning scraping burnt stew off the pans. No more getting up at five in the morning to prepare breakfast for fifty guests. No more changing sheets until four in the afternoon. No more listening to idiotic families fight about stupid things all day. I have time to sleep and relax and read and study for the first time since March. I love this rain. Oh crap! Rain! Gotta get the sheets in! Bye!

January 12 1992

Sean and I stayed out in the forest til four this morning watching a nest of Knarls from up a tree under one of his invisibility blankets. It was so great! There were seven of them – two adults, three young ones, and two babies that hadn't even developed their spines yet. They were lovely. I think I like animal studies the best of all the subjects I'm doing for my NEWTs. But I couldn't tell any of the others, because they'd just get offended. It's not that I don't like potions or charms + curses or herbology or astronomy, I just sort of prefer the animals. I'd love a pet – Monster Mouse doesn't count, he was only there for a few months, so I never got to know him or anything. No, what I'd like is a big pet – a dog or a snake or something. That would be brilliant.


	3. Chapter 3

This is a story about an original character – to those who are not fans of OCs, turn back now. I am not Ms Rowling, nor am I in any way connected with Bloomsbury or Warner Bros.

And now, read on.

Chapter 3

March 14

I DON'T BELIEVE IT!!! They gave me a hawk! That was my birthday present from everyone – a 4-month old kestrel! He's so beautiful – steel grey body with a blue shimmer, and these huge big navy blue eyes! I called him Thor, after the muggle Norse thunder god, and I think it's a very suitable name, because when I brought him outside and unhooded him, he darted off like a thunderbolt and caught a mouse. The screams were unbelievable! I'm going to train him to fly above me, and when he gets big enough, I'll train him to catch big game, like rabbits and rats!

February 18 1993

I did it, I finished my NEWTs. I'm so tired. Thor is getting real mad at me but I can't hunt with him right now. I'm too tired. I think I did okay though. I hope so, with the amount of effort I put in.

August 5

I did do well! WAHOOO!!! I got my exam results today! An E in Charms, Os in everything else! We're all going out to a fancy restaurant tonight to celebrate. I'm so proud!

August 6

SEAN GAVE ME A GOLDEN EAGLE!!! He is so amazingly gorgeous (the bird, not Sean!)! I love him so much (again, the bird)! He's called Loki, because Loki is the Norse god of fire and mischief, and that suits him perfectly. His feathers are the colour of flames, and he keeps stealing all the other birds food. Cheeky little brat. But he is beautiful when he flies, and so fast when he hunts, and he can kill a rabbit even though he's so young. I love him.

March 15 1994

I thought everyone was being really secretive recently, but I've been really busy the birds and I never really thought to ask why. Anyway, yesterday I found out. They'd been planning my birthday for weeks - they got me a wolf! In keeping with tradition, I have named him Fenrir (wolf-child of Loki, eater of Tyr's hand and all around evil bastard. My kind of guy!) Thankfully, the birds quite like him. I saw Loki picking fleas off him last night and eating them, and Fenrir didn't mind. I think he may have been asleep. Puppies need a lot of sleep, so presumably, wolf cubs do too. I really like him, though. I guess I've proved that I am responsible enough to take care of him. Oh, and apparently I've earned a new name. Everyone signed my birthday card 'To Kitty Hawke'. I like it! I always used to be Kit Smith, but one time, I heard someone say something about Catherine Bones one time. I like Kitty Hawke better. Much better.

July 24

Today, uncle Langley presented me with one last bird. He said that I can't have any more for a while, but I don't mind. This one's lovely – she's an osprey – a fish-eating eagle, and I've called her Jormungand, which was the serpent that circled the world to make the sea. Now I have enough, I think. Lidia's started calling me Kittiwake. I don't think I mind. I like birds, so I quite like being called after one.

October 2

I've been out hunting all week! Uncle Langley gave me a tent and a sleeping bag in August, but I didn't have time to use them til now. And it was brilliant! Thor was magnificent – he just kept on after his targets, and he was so fast that hardly any got away. They were all on top form, even Jormungand when we got to a lake. It was one of the best weeks of my life. Even Fenrir had fun, chasing rabbits left, right and centre. He never caught any, but he really enjoyed it anyway. I have to do this again!

February 13 1995

It's absolutely pissing rain outside, so naturally Fenrir is outside, swimming in puddles and rolling in something horrible. Dim dog... well, wolf, technically, but I always had this image of wolves as really graceful animals, and there is no way that Fenrir could be described as graceful, by any definition of the word! I do love him though.

June 16

The Master's back! We got the news at three this morning, and everyone in the hotel is celebrating. There was a meeting of the Inner Circle when he returned last night, and uncle Avery came to us right after he got back to tell us. Apparently, he's in a right pissy temper – the Master, not uncle Avery, although he wasn't too delighted either. He didn't say why, but he was walking really stiffly, and limping a little. I think someone got a little dose of Cruciatus! This is a good day – the hotel is full of delighted people eagerly discussing the future – positively, for the first time in my memory. Uncle Langley says it's the first time a lot of these people have been happy in thirteen years, since the Master disappeared. I'm not sure how I feel. I don't remember the Master. But I think I'm happy. Maybe it's just because everyone is, or maybe it's because I've listened to Lidia saying how much better life would be when the Master returns, and that this is my subconscious wanting to believe her. Personally, I don't care about current affairs very much, just as long as they don't affect me and Fenrir and my birds.

July 9

I've been sitting at this desk with the book open in front of me and a pen in my hand for the last thirty minutes, wondering how to write down a whole day. Start in the morning and work up to now, I suppose. Okay. Yesterday morning, at breakfast, the hotel was raided. Aurors crashing through windows, throwing spells all over the place. Sean was sitting next to me and he dragged me out through the kitchen to the stables out back. I rounded up all the animals while he set up a portkey, and then the portkey activated and we were all in a pub. Animals and all. It would have been kind of funny any other time, but I was a little distracted. Anyway, Sean left me in the lounge while he went off into a back room to talk to the Master, and I was out there, trying to control a herd of animals who have just been portkeyed halfway across the country without any warning. Needless to say, they weren't very happy. Sean was gone for about three quarters of an hour, and when he came back, he wasn't looking too happy either. He said the Master wanted to see me, so I went into the inner sanctum to oblige. Now, all my life, I've heard how the Master is all-powerful and everything, but no-one ever mentioned the fact that he also looks like a snake. I've nothing against snakes, but it's a bit of a shocker to finally meet the man whom you've been brought up to think of as god, and to find out that your lord is a short reptilian bloke. But I digress. Anyway, I went to talk to the Master, and he told me that uncle Langley and Lidia and mister Alexis and Jamie had all been arrested, along with most of the guests. Mister Alexis' family had got away, and so had one or two others, but most of them had been caught by the Ministry. Crash goes my whole life. Not a pleasant sensation. Then the Master said that I was to stay with him for a few days, until the next Gathering, when he would find me a new place to stay. So at the moment I'm up in this room, sitting at this desk, writing about writing. Now I'm going to finish up by writing about sleeping, and then I'm going to go and live it. At least my birds are okay. And Fenrir.


	4. Chapter 4

This is a story about an original character – to those who are not fans of OCs, turn back now. I am not Ms Rowling, nor am I in any way connected with Bloomsbury or Warner Bros.

And now, read on.

Chapter 4

June 17

New room, new house, new family, new life. Only not really as easy as that. It's hard, just forgetting about them – uncle Langley and everyone. They weren't bad people, they just believed in different things to the people who have the power. And now they're in Azkaban because of it. I thought we lived in a democracy, not a dictatorship. Not that the Malfoy's aren't nice – they are, they're lovely. They're going out of their way to be good to me, but I just don't seem to be able to be grateful. At least they let me keep the birds and Fenrir, though. If they hadn't, I would have just left.

July 3

I think I'm okay now. The Master sent word yesterday, through Sean, that uncle Langley and everyone didn't get put in Azkaban. They are in jail, but only in Walpurgis, which doesn't employ Dementors. Just Aurors. Which means it's just as hard to break out, but at least they're spared the Dementing. Another factor in my recovery is Draco Malfoy, the very nice son of Lucius and Narcissa. He arrived home form Hogwarts yesterday, bearing gifts – namely, chocolate! Even if he had been a hunch-backed dwarf with a plague of boils (which he isn't), he would still have been alright in my book because of the chocolate! And he's quite handsome too... no, not handsome... beautiful, really. I know beautiful isn't usually a term associated with men, but he is. Honestly, some people get all the luck. Here's the Malfoys – tall, blonde, delicate features, thin, beautiful, and then there's me – short, dark, plump and looking like some three year old made me with modelling clay. It's just not fair. Oh well. My birds don't care what I look like.

August 30

I was talking to Draco today, asking him about his school, and he told me that he hasn't done his OWLs yet. He's nearly fifteen years old! I did my OWLs at ten! I'd done my NEWTs at his age! I must be quite smart. Interesting. Anyway, he says he's just finished fourth year and that he'll be doing the OWLs next year. I'd love to go to Hogwarts – it sounds like so much fun. He says he's studying Care of Magical Creatures, Arithmancy (which seems to be telling the future by numbers), and Ancient Civilisations, as well as the core subjects of Potions, Defence against the Dark Arts, Herbology, Charms, Astrology and Transfiguration. I was never able to get the hang of Transfiguration. I never really saw the point. I can conjure and summon quite well, and I know all sorts of concealment and vanishing charms that are a lot quicker. I've never had a proper conversation with a person near my age before. All the kids who come – no, came, I keep forgetting - to the hotel are spoilt brats. They all just want to play on their daddy's racing brooms and they always laugh at me for not being able to fly. Draco's... interesting. And nice.

December 25

Today is the day some muggles call Christmas – their god's birthday. The Malfoy's don't celebrate it, but they did mention it at dinner today, albeit to laugh at the idea that a god has to be born. They had an interesting theory on gods, though. Mister Malfoy thinks that gods are 'born' when people start to believe in them, and they die when people no longer believe. It's an interesting idea, isn't it? Maybe they get more powerful the more people believe, too. I think it's very funny that a family can have a discussion all night about something that none of them believe in!

February 2 1996

I'm in deep trouble at the moment – I went out into the forest behind the manor yesterday with my birds and Fenrir to get a bit of exercise, and I got a little lost. I wasn't gone all that long – I got back at four this morning, but they made such a fuss! I tried to explain about Fenrir deciding to try to squeeze into a badger's sett, but they just wouldn't listen. I suppose they're not just used to me, but I can't help wishing I was back in the hotel with everyone sometimes.

March 14

Happy birthday to me! Birthdays here are a really big deal! Mister Malfoy got me loads of presents, and missus Malfoy got the house-elves to make a huge big cake and party food and everything! I got new pens and ink and a new diary to write in when I've finished this one and food for the birds and steak for Fenrir and a new hood for Loki because he pecked through his one and a top-of-the-range gauntlet for me so that the birds don't break the skin when they land on my arm and a flea-collar for Fenrir – very important! – and loads of chocolate and sweets. And mister and missus Malfoy took me to London and brought me clothes shopping yesterday and...

They're so good to me! When we were in Diagon Alley, mister Malfoy brought me into Ollivander's and HE GOT ME A WAND!!! My very own wand, not a second-hand ball of sparks! It's so lovely – it's apple wood with phoenix feather inside, and it's twelve inches long and swishy and it's really plain and I love it! I was casting charms and curses all the way home in the carriage and it works perfectly!

I love this house!!!

May 19

Mister Malfoy is teaching me more curses. He's very good at them. He has a whole wing of the manor devoted to a magical library, and most of those are curses. It's very interesting. I wish I'd known half of these when the Ministry raided the hotel. There would have been some very uncomfortable aurors that night, I can tell you! Mister Malfoy practices on one of the house-elves, who seem to enjoy pain, so I don't feel bad hurting them. I probably wouldn't feel bad hurting them even if they were affected by pain, though. I seem to only be sympathetic to animals. How odd...


	5. Chapter 5

This is a story about an original character – to those who are not fans of OCs, turn back now. I am not Ms Rowling, nor am I in any way connected with Bloomsbury or Warner Bros.

And now, read on.

Chapter 5

June 22

GRINDEWALD DAMN THE BLOODY MINISTRY! Every time I get settled in with a family, they come tearing in and bust it up! Mister Malfoy got arrested yesterday for:

- Consorting with a known criminal (to whit, Tom Marvolo Riddle, aka 'Lord Voldemort', 'The Master', 'You-Know-Who', 'He Who Must Not Be Named', 'The Dark Lord', etc.),

- Breaking into an official Ministry building,

- Causing destruction to Ministry property (to whit, one fountain, bronze),

- Causing a Breach of the Peace,

- Causing Grievous Bodily Harm to one Harry James Potter, and

- Numerous charges of murder and torture of Muggles.

Have I mentioned recently that I HATE THE MINISTRY?! Mister Malfoy is in Azkaban, not Walpurgis, because he is a member of the Inner Circle, unlike uncle Langley and everyone. Missus Malfoy is distraught. She screamed and screamed when we got the news this afternoon. He was actually arrested yesterday, but we didn't find out til today at dinner time, when the aurors arrived to search the house. Missus Malfoy sent an owl out to me in the stables to say that I was to go to this place by portkey and wait for her there. So I did. And she still hasn't arrived. But the Master has. He's not very happy at all. He keeps on cursing the Ministry, and his lackey, Wormtail, keeps on reminding him that it probably won't work from this distance. Honestly, that man has got a n over-active suicide gland! Every time he says anything, the Master's wand is pointing at him, and the Master's mouth moving to say the cruciatus curse. If anyone ever does the priori incantatem thing on the Master's wand, there's going to be a long line of pain curses!

I hope missus Malfoy is alright. And that mister Malfoy either gets out of Azkaban really quickly or dies just as soon. I've seen a Dementor. It's horrible. I'd rather be dead than living near even one of those for the rest of my life, let alone hundreds. I wonder has anyone told Draco yet?

July 3

Meeting tonight. I get farmed out onto yet another death eater. They'd better like animals, that's all I can say. Fingers crossed.

July 4

The Master says I'm going to go live with a mister Snape. He's picking me up in a few minutes. He wasn't able to take me after the meeting last night because he had to organise somewhere for me to stay. Something tells me he doesn't have kids. What fun.

July 5

Mister Snape is actually kind of nice. I mean, he's very quiet, but he's not a Morecambe-esque type of guy. Not a typical death eater either. I haven't heard him once curse the ministry or muggles or anything. Maybe he'll be like uncle Langley again. That'd be nice. We haven't gone home yet, because he arrived very late, and then spent ages talking to the Master. So we're staying in the Master's residence for one more night. So far, all I've learned about the guy is what he looks like and half his name. S. Snape. Tall, black hair, dark, strict-looking, plain black robes, slightly haunted eyes. He looks pretty nervous around the Master, but then, most people do. I hope he's nice.

July 6

Mister Snape is a professor in Hogwarts! He teaches potions! I like him already! It's the summer holidays there at the moment, so he's not teaching right now, but maybe he can help me with a few of my trial draughts for healing wounds. I've been working on them since Solstice, when Loki got a little excited by some fireworks and scratched himself. He's fine now, but it would be great to have a quick way to heal animals.

I haven't met any of the other teachers yet except headmaster Dumbledore, but I'm really looking forward to it. Mister Snape gave me a room joined on to his apartments in the dungeons that he used to use as a storeroom, but he cleared it out when he found out I was coming. It's not life in the lap of luxury like with the Malfoys, but it's clean and it's comfortable and I like it. There's also a tunnel going up to a shed that I can use to house my birds and, unfortunately, Fenrir. I'm not allowed keep him in my room. I don't like it, and he doesn't either, but mister Snape says definitely not, and I'm not going to fight with him this early on. I'll just bring Fenrir down after mister Snape is asleep and bring him back before morning. What? I've been brought up by death eaters all my life! Of course I'm not going to do everything anyone says!

August 30

He found out. He came in to check on me this morning and I hadn't put Fenrir out yet and he saw him. But he wasn't angry. I mean, he tried to be, but I don't think his heart was in it. I think he likes me. I know I like him. He's a little gruff, but he's very kind deep down. He doesn't tell me what to do very often, and when he does, it usually makes sense. Except for the Fenrir thing. That was just him showing me that he's boss. I think.

Anyway, he's brilliant at potions. I asked him for a bit of help yesterday with the cut sealer I was working on, and he looked all surprised that I was interested in potions, and then he sat down and put a completely new spin on it, one I would never have thought of on my own. He suggested using bloodwort root in it to replace the blood while the scab was forming, and it worked. Really well. I tested it on myself after it had cooled, and I hardly lost any blood. Mister Snape looked kind of shocked that I would test it on myself – he said he thought that was what the birds were for. So I hexed him. A lot. No-one threatens my birds, not even my guardian. He looked very surprised – obviously no-one has retaliated in a long time. Then he got me with one of his own (thirty six hours later, I still have whiskers. Damn him!) and then it lapsed into all-out war! I must say, the look on headmaster Dumbledore's face when we burst into the great hall was priceless!

I suppose we did look rather odd – I'd just cast a distortion hex on mister Snape, and he looked strangely like a Picasso painting. It suited him though. Then the headmaster joined in. Things got kind of surreal after that. I remember seeing the little charms professor levitating three feet above the table, but when I mentioned it to mister Snape afterwards, he said that it hadn't been a hex, professor Flitwick was just fed up of talking to people's waists. Also, I'm almost positive I saw one of the teachers turn into a cat. Headmaster Dumbledore came down to the dungeon this morning to congratulate us for such an interesting activity, and to suggest that we organise it for the students some time. Mister Snape went a very interesting colour at that. I don't think he likes children very much, although why he became a teacher if he doesn't like kids is beyond me. I think I like this school. It's completely nuts!

The students start arriving tomorrow. Headmaster Dumbledore asked me if I'd like to do any exams. I told him that I'd done all my exams, but that if it was okay with the teachers, I'd drop into a few classes now and then. I'd like to see what Draco's Ancient Civilisations is about, and how they teach things here.


	6. Chapter 6

This is a story about an original character – to those who are not fans of OCs, turn back now. I am not Ms Rowling, nor am I in any way connected with Bloomsbury or Warner Bros.

And now, read on.

Chapter 6

September 3

Merlin, these kids are noisy! I was at the feast two nights ago, and I still have a headache! Mister Snape is grumpy too. We were bitching together all day about the students. Quietly. It was fun. I saw Draco yesterday. He came down to talk to mister Snape (his godfather. Small world, huh?) and he got the shock of his life when he saw me! Hee hee hee! Well, now I know the other half of mister Snape's name – Severus. Sev for short. I used it after Draco left, and he threatened to disembowel me if I ever called him that in public. So from now on, he is Sev. Of course. He should really study human nature. If you tell a person not to do something, they will automatically do it. I wonder what he'd do to me if I called him Sevvie? Only one way to find out!

September 4

He doesn't like being called Sevvie. Especially not at the teachers table at dinner time. At the top of my voice. All I said was 'Pass the salt, Sevvie', and he went bright red. It's a good colour on him. He should wear it more often. Afterwards, he didn't quite disembowel me, but almost. He used a very obscure pain potion in my morning yoghurt that I couldn't find an antidote to for an hour. Jerk. I'm going to get him back for that.

September 6

I got him back! Unfortunately, he then retaliated, so that I had to go around all day unable to say anything but 'I am a spoilt child'. I really think he over-reacted. All I did was dye his hair red. It would have washed right out. But instead, he decided to try and hex it off, and seeing as I had included an anti-hexing draught in the formula, it didn't work as well as he had hoped. But he got the pink out eventually. With some help from professor Flitwick, the charms teacher.

September 11

I attended a couple of classes today. First I went with Sev to his seventh year potions class. I didn't learn anything new, except that if you mix puff adder venom with violet roots, you get a big bang. I'll have to try that later. Possibly when Sev is asleep. Then I went to see what they learn in Defence against the Dark Arts. Absolutely sod all. Honestly, if they keep it up this way, the Master is going to be home and dry. I wonder if the teacher is a death eater? I'll have to ask Sev...

So after that big wash-out, I got fed up and I brought the birds out for a bit of fresh air. Fenrir came too, and we were out about an hour and a half when we stumbled upon a class – Care of Magical Creatures. Good stuff, too – unicorns. I hadn't seen one in a few years, so I settled down to watch the class. Only, the teacher noticed me and came over, and stared for a while until Loki arrived back with a rat and the professor gaped in shock. The class were all staring at me and the bird, and the professor had sort of copped on that I wasn't in her class and was apologising. Then, Odin appeared, and a couple of the female members of the class started shrieking when Jormungand landed and started eating his rabbit, but they all were scared when Fenrir arrived. He's still young – only about two, but he's gotten so big. He does look pretty scary, especially when he's running to meet me, but he's really just a big softy. But the class didn't know that. So there was the professor backing away from me, and the kids looking terrified, and me with all my birds ripping up dead animals and Fenrir showing off, growling and drooling, loving the attention. So I gave Fenrir a big wallop and told him to behave, and I called all the birds to me, and then I apologised to the professor – that I hadn't realised there was a class, and that I was just out for a walk with my pets, and that they weren't dangerous at all unless you were a rabbit, and that I was just going and that they could get back to their unicorns, and very pretty unicorns they were too, and I legged it!

Later on, after dinner, Sev came into my room with this big grin on his face and he said that I had terrified a poor group of first years and their teacher, how much money did I want? I'm definitely doing that again tomorrow!

October 9

I've been roped into helping Sev with a few of his classes for the next few days, because he's wrecked after an all-night death eater meeting. I subbed for him yesterday, and it was grand because it was only second and third years, but now I have to take all his classes for two days, and help for another week. Damn jerk. I have no clue what he's teaching them, and when I ask them, they tell me they're learning colour-changing draughts and feather-light mixtures. Those were practically the first things I learned! He can't still be doing those, can he? Hang on, I'll ask him...

He is. I don't believe it. His excuse is that no-one in this school shows any talent at all, and I can understand that – after all, I did teach them – but even with the slowest class, he should surely have been able to drill the easy things into them by the end of first year. It's going to be worse than I thought. Please Merlin let the older classes know something. Anything!

October 11

I am dead on my feet. I am a bloody zombie. This school is hopeless for potions. The only class that is up to OWLs standard is the seventh year advanced NEWTs class. I am going to die if I have to do this for much longer. No wonder Sev is such a grumpy bastard in class. Of course, they're not all dreadful – some of them are pretty good. But the class averages are pathetic. I'd love it if the classes were split up into good and bad, and I could take the good ones and Sev, with his infinite patience (well, compared to mine, anyway!) could take the crap ones. Draco's pretty good (must be all that extra tuition he gets from his godfather), and that Weasley girl, Ginny. Hermione Granger in fifth year isn't bad at all, and there's that little second year, what's his name?... Oh yeah, Thomas Swann. He could be quite good with a bit of work. There's a good few in sixth and seventh year, possibly because dear Sev is so fussy about who gets in at all, and there's one kid in third year who is very enthusiastic, if not terribly adept.

And then there's mister Potter. The famous Harry Potter, the all-powerful child who nearly defeated the Master. Judging by his performance in potions, I honestly don't see how. Or why the Master is so worried about him that he lures him into the Ministry of Magic and attacks him, getting mister Malfoy arrested and thrown in jail in the process. Yep, I'm still bitter. Potter is useless in class – the only reason he's still surviving is because miss Granger insists on helping him no matter what. I'm too tired for this and I have to be up at the crack of dawn tomorrow to help Sev set up a surprise practical test for the fifth years. He really is a bastard, isn't he? I should probably warn Draco... nah. Too tired. G'night.


	7. Chapter 7

This is a story about an original character – to those who are not fans of OCs, turn back now. I am not Ms Rowling, nor am I in any way connected with Bloomsbury or Warner Bros.

And now, read on.

Chapter 7

October 19

I need to relieve some stress – some my own, more of it Sev's. He made two first years cry today, and, much as I enjoy seeing people suffer, Sev needs to be cheered up. I wonder if Dumbledore remembers that suggestion he made about letting the students try the hexing game?

October 20

Yep, he remembered. He was just waiting for me to ask. He announced it at dinner tonight after discussing it with Flitwick. (Not directly – he just suggested that the students revise a few spells over the next few days. They all thought there was a test coming up. The groan was absolutely beautiful.) Then we had a council of war (Dumbledore's words, not mine. Honestly, that man really needs to act his age sometimes!) until half two this morning, just Flitwick, McGonagall, Dumbledore and me. We didn't actually invite McGonagall, she just sort of showed up. So we organised the details – there would be four teams – the four houses. Flitwick wanted to mix them, to 'promote inter-house relations', but we decided it would be more fun the other way. More... vicious. So it's going to be after dinner the day after tomorrow – Saturday, so that:

a) we won't be disturbing classes, and

b) if any injuries occur, there'll be Sunday to recover.

We decided that it'll be 'spontaneous' – ie. I will suddenly jump onto the teacher's table and hex Dumbledore. Nothing too violent, he says. I think something of the colour-changing variety. Or possibly a change of clothes – maybe something along the lines of a medieval princesses gown, complete with full make-up. Yes, I'm going to have to do it now, just to see the images that are going through my head right now in the flesh. They're not pretty. I want to share them with the world.

Professor McGonagall had some very practical suggestions to contribute –

- Cast an anti-harm charm over the whole hall before it starts, so that spells can't get too out of hand,

- Have Madam Pomfrey (the nurse) stationed somewhere in the hall as a first aid post,

- Suggest to people that they don't attack the first and second years too much,

- Have at least one teacher hovering above the action at all times to keep an eye on things ('things' being mainly the Slytherins)

- Set up a points system, similar to the house points hourglasses, eg - how many spells cast per house minus how many times hit,

- Cast an strengthening spell on the windows, doors, tables, chairs and possibly the walls before the start so nothing gets damaged too badly,

- Inform the house-elves beforehand,

- Have the cutlery, crockery and food disappear before it starts,

- Have a scoreboard up to see who's leading – top twenty people or so,

- Have extra points for the most interesting result at the end (ie booby prize – person who's been hit with most spells)

- Convert the marks earned into house points at the end.

If it goes well, Dumbledore says we could turn it into a tradition – on the first Saturday of the term, maybe. I can't wait!

October 23

It was wonderful! It lasted ages and it got so imaginative towards the end! The booby prize winner was a Gryffindor sixth year called Ronald Weasley. The result was fantastic! Pink tutu, hair in a rainbow mohican about four feet high, tiger face and tail, three-inch-long blood-red talons, leg hair in little beaded plaits, eyes changing colour every few seconds, snake tongue, no teeth, little blue spots all down his left arm and little pink hearts all down his right, and whenever he spoke, bubbles came out of his mouth with the word floating around inside it! It was spectacular! Coincidentally, the actual winner was a Gryffindor fifth year called Ginny Weasley...

One of the most interesting/disturbing results, depending on your point of view, was a Hufflepuff fourth year named Zaccharias Gibson who ended up with a completely see-through skin. You could see all his organs and veins and everything, all working away as though there was nothing wrong. Nobody could figure out how it had happened for about half an hour, until Draco sidled up and undid it. It turned out it was a vanishing charm with some interesting subtleties, which Flitwick was most interested in, and spent nearly twenty minutes talking to Draco to find out how he had done it, until he was called away to help a Ravenclaw third year unstick her fingers from each other.

Sev tried to remain dignified at the start but he soon discovered how difficult it is to remain aloof when you're floating six yards above the floor with your robes over your head, so he gave up and hexed me right back.

But Dumbledore was the best of all. Most of the students were a bit reluctant to start hexing their headmaster at the start, but after you've been hit in the face by a flying banana-and-custard pie, which seemed to be his speciality, it hard not to retaliate. He ended up as a sort of mutated banana (my fault – I dressed him in a yellow dress that looked like a banana skin, and I couldn't resist finishing the job later on. I paid for it though – he turned my hands into tins of sardines. Jormungand is even now nibbling my fingers to find where the fishy smell is coming from) wearing body paint, a tea cosy and a lime green jacket with sequins. Oh, and bright orange lipstick. That was Sev. He admitted to it later. It was very suitable.

The teachers mainly targeted each other because the students were too worried about annoying them, so they were all VERY interesting. Flitwick must have five hands, judging by the amount of people ending up hovering above everyone else's heads!

This was definitely a good idea. Admittedly, there are still people walking around with blue warpaint all over them, or crying blood (the only two things not even Flitwick could reverse) but the warpaint seems to be fading, and Flitwick is still working on the blood. I'm sort of expecting Draco to admit to that one too. It seems his style.

We have to do this again!

November 4

Interesting... I never met anyone who was calm enough around me to insult me before, but the Care of Magical Creatures teacher just came right up to me and asked me if I'd come to his class because none of his students had studied anything like me before. Jerk. I'm not unusual... at least, _I_ don't think I am. But I suppose I've grown up with me. Maybe people who see me for the first time think I'm odd. I guess I do look a little odd... have I ever described myself to you? Well, I'm black. And not just dark brown like an African, I'm actually sort of steel-grey, with a hint of blue. Ever seen a black horse? Well, that's me. Very definitely me! See, I'm a centaur. I just read back over this book and I realised I never made that clear. Kind of silly of me, really, considering that's the first thing most people notice about me!

Anyway, that Care of Magical Creatures teacher was very blunt – Sev says he's a half-giant, so that could account for some of his courage, but that's no excuse to be so damn rude! Calling me a creature, like a fwooper or a knarl! It's downright insulting, that's what it is! I'm a being – that was decided years ago. No half-giant's allowed go around calling me a beast and getting away with it! Sev and I are going to get him at dinner tonight – Sev's keeping an eye on a disfigurment potion for me that should turn _him _into a freak... well, even more of one, anyway. Oh, look, there's my bitchy side showing up again!

November 5

Hee hee hee! I love doing that to people! And half-giants, as it turns out... Sev and I were watching the potion all night, and then we slipped it in his milk at breakfast. It was hilarious! He didn't even notice the fur and claws until he got to his first class. Draco was in it, so he gave a detailed blow-by-blow account. They were working with Kneazles and the professor, Hagrid, ended up with little fluffy bundles hanging off his clothes and skin and everything! I wish I'd seen it! Sev gave me a reward – ten sickles! I bought the birds some seed, and Fenrir got a bloody great bone. He was crunching away at it all night and whining whenever he got a splinter of bone lodged between his teeth. Big twit.


End file.
